By Supriya Ramesh
New Delhi, April 25 (IANS) “I had no difficulty in accepting my child when he opened up about his sexual orientation more than a decade ago,” said Aruna Desai, co-founder of ‘Sweekar – The Rainbow Parents’ and a mother of a 33-year-old.
The queer community, their parents and allies surely have great expectations from the Supreme Court as it continued hearing, for the fourth day, in a batch of petitions seeking legal validation for same-sex marriage.
In hope of acceptance, Sweekar, a support group for and by parents of LGBTQIA+ children, has written to the Chief Justice of India appealing to consider the plea for marriage equality.
The group of 400 parents was found in February 2017 to navigate their journey towards acceptance.
“My journey has been absolutely fantastic. My son was super scared to open up before me for the obvious fear that I would disown him, or not love him, or get mad at him. But I had accepted him the day I had conceived him,” Desai told IANS.
Desai said that she started learning about queer people when once in 2007, her child’s friend discussed with her how another friend is being ill-treated by his parents for coming out as a gay.
“Back then, nobody spoke about it. It was a taboo and as I wanted to help that child, I started reading and educating myself about queer people,” Desai said, as she pointed out that it took education, debate and patience with the LGBTQIA+ children to realise that their lives, their feelings and their desires are all valid.
“My child was 17 when he told me about being gay. He asked me if I will stop loving him, and I told him that I will love you even more,” Desai recalled.
The Sweekar group, in its letter, has said that it desires to see the children find legal acceptance for their relationship under the Special Marriage Act, adding that it is certain that “a nation as big as ours which respects its diversity and stands for the value of exclusion will open its legal gate of marriage equality to their children too”.
“We are getting old. Some of us will touch 80 soon… We hope that we will get to see the legal stamp on the rainbow marriage of our children in our lifetime,” the letter read.
It said “from knowing about gender and sexuality, to understanding the lives of our children, to finally accepting their sexuality and their loved ones, the parents have gone through the whole gamut of emotions”.
The letter added: “We empathise with those who are opposing marriage equality, because some of us were there too. It took us education, debate and patience with our LIGTQIA+ children to realise that their lives, their feelings and their desires are valid. Similarly, we hope that those who oppose marriage equality will come around too. We have faith in the people of India, the Constitution and the democracy of our nation.”
Referring to the top court’s 2018 judgement by which it decriminalised consensual gay sex, the group wrote: “On September 6, 2018, the Supreme Court of India read down Section 377 to decriminalise consensual sexual relationships, and in doing so, with its statements, ascertained that our children should be treated with dignity and acceptance.
“As we write this message in April 2023, it is almost 5 years to the Navtej Singh Johar vs Union of India judgement. Gender and sexuality made it to election manifestos and corporate India has also begun opening up gradually to the idea of queer lives.
“Society is a changing and evolving phenomenon. Just as a rising tide lifts all boats, the judgement by the Supreme Court created a ripple effect on society and has helped move the needle from hate to tolerance to acceptance.”
–IANS
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